Models, beach strutters, hot mamas at the club, the cute girl at the coffee shop, honey pots at the front of your college class, that stunner secretary at work … they’re beautiful people all right, but not enviable by most standards, and certainly not worth fretting your own looks over.
The “beautiful people” most of us might so envy for their beauty are often some of the most insecure, self-concious people you’ll ever meet. I watch the trophy wives on TV playing “Wives of ____ County,” or the models you see in movies and the like, or walking the strips and boardwalks like here in San Diego, and while their beauty alone doesn’t dictate who they are on the inside, how they portray themselves often lends a great deal to their inner quality.
This is not a treatise on some inverse value of higher physical attraction to lower interior quality of soul. I’ve met some of the most beautiful people on the inside and out. But most? And I’m not just out to bash “hot” people. If anything, I’m trying to illustrate for any who might look upon them with envy.
Note: I’m not really including guys in this post because, let’s be honest, I don’t look at guys for attractive quality, so I have no real observation to offer.
For those of you who find yourselves comparing you to people you consider “beautiful,” know that many to most of them who might be at the higher end of the scale base a great deal of who they are by their attractiveness. It becomes a foundation to their world that they are found attractive. That’s why mom’s obsess about looking as thin as their daughters, teen girls want plastic surgery before they’re done even developing into the women they’re going to be, soon captured by the media’s worship of women carved by photoshop.
You can watch the older women dying to look like they’re younger, as if the sum of their value was calculated in the tightness of their skin or bounce of their breasts. You can see the youngers aching to be older. You watch an entire gender of self-conscious humans with real hearts and minds and souls wishing to exist within a 10-12 year timeframe of an average 70-year lifespan. Does that jive with anyone?
Are we so shallow as to base our entire lives on the short onset of our adulthood? You might say it is when we are more vibrant, most capable of bouncing back from our mistakes, a period where we likely will make the most mistakes after leaving the protection of our parents. We’re simultaneously youthful and yet adult-like. People wish we could maintain that forever, an immortal state of perpetual vibrancy.
But that’s not reality folks. We will grow and degrade. We will lose the stretch in our skin and breath in our lungs. The key here, like last night’s post about the apocalypse and embracing life, was to enjoy who we are where we are. When we’re 22 and attractive and completely stupid, enjoy it! When we’re 35 with a spouse and a kid, enjoy life! When we’re 62 and wondering what health problems we feel comfortable talking to our grown kids about, enjoy your wisdom and well-spent life!
Life is way too short to spend wishing you were somewhere in the future or somewhere in the past. Your life is a one-way scroll and it doesn’t change direction and it doesn’t pause, and if you spend the entirety of that life wishing you only had to experience a part of that life, you’re missing the awesome opportunity of depth and growth each phase of life offers.
Each comes replete with opportunities for joy and growth and life. You want more out of life? This is like eating healthy with every part of the pyramid, not just the sweets. Sweets make you fat, figuratively if not physically, and eating the full range of foods makes you feel better than just cake or ice cream.
Start living in this moment. Male, female or somewhere in between, life is right now, not in yesterday or tomorrow. If you do want to feel better, go work out, change your eating habits, live healthy. Enhance life in this moment. But don’t get caught up wishing you could be like you “were,” just be the best you can be right now.
Go for gold, my friends. Live now.