The Foolish Fear of Forever Alone

I could not count the fingers on both hands the number of girls I’ve met in my life who, after ending a relationship with their beau, lament with all emotional sovereignty that love is not meant for them, that they do not see how they shall ever find love (violin music, British lilt pouring out of their puckered lips, tears down their ruddy, flustered faces), and that love is not at all worth the trouble they have seen themselves through in this latest and greatest debacle of their hearts.

And for any of my friends who think “Forever Alone” is my attempt to poke fun at a particular phrase I’ve heard bandied around, that is not my intent. It merely fits best for my post.

Now back to the antiwaulin’.

I hear the lamenting and the wauling and the wailing from the broken relationships and I’m totally there for my friends. I’ve always been a shoulder, and I’m happy to be one. But what I won’t put up with words of fatalism. I know feelings can feel like things will never change, but fatalism just seems wrong. I can’t even explain exactly why. In the next few paragraphs, I’ll probably tell you many logical reasons why fatalism is a bad idea.

I suppose teasing with the idea of letting go of hope is bad. To ever allow the chance of the chaotic winds of change to threaten the glimmer of your future hope just seems unwise..

We all lose the winds in our sails, and sometimes our hope is nothing more than a cherry on the candle. But never tease yourself with snuffing it out!

Your heart is broken and spilling out across the floor, but to lament that there is no future for you is to capitulate to the worst of fears, that the present should somehow forever stain the possibility of tomorrow. That the world and all its wonders have now died to the hurt within, as if its presence means death itself is upon your doorstep.

Perhaps I’m just too much of an optimist. Perhaps my perspective is so often macro that see the big picture more than the little picture, even if I’m in pain. And that, with no surprise, has its downsides. I miss subtleties others cannot help but stare upon.

I suppose that’s one reason I miss out on so much drama. I look at the bigger picture so often that the little things upon which drama revolves pass me by completely. And I’m perfectly comfortable with that. I rather detest drama.

But back to the fear of being forever alone.

My dear lovelies who have felt your heart broken by a man for whom your love was secure and deep, do not lament for ever, for ever can change in a single moment, and from every single moment to the next. If you love deeply and wish to love long, and your heart feels lost to the nethers of your torment, fear not, for the sunrise will come tomorrow, and with it new opportunities for peace and romance and consummation the likes of which your former lover might never have dreamed of bringing to you.

There is no guarantees, for guarantees neither evolved nor were birched upon us by God, nor ever will be, and by that token comes the promise of tomorrow, that while there love is not guaranteed, neither is our torment! All things have a season. Love deeply, love truly, and when the time ends, let this love go, but do not let go of your heart or the hope borne within for a better tomorrow!

Sleep well my friends. God bless you and sleep sweet, ever anticipating the opportunity of every dawn.