I Didn't Need to See That

The older I get and more I change, the less I want to see skin on the big screen. I’m was watching the new Conan on Saturday and the female lead is just absolutely stunning. She’s played in several other films I’ve seen, including the redhead from GI Joe and another movie I can’t remember at the moment. She’s even more beautiful as a frizzy-haired brunette. Very simple look, real, approachable, beautiful and earthy.

And then there’s the sex scene.

It’s not about jealousy of a petite beauty with a bulky Hawaiian or what have you. It’s like, I honestly don’t want to see her naked, and for multiple reasons.

First, I actually lose respect for a female actress willing to bare her modesty on screen.

Second, she doesn’t belong to me. I don’t want to see it.

Third, I don’t want temptation in my life. I want to be clean and clear mentally and emotionally for my future wife. She deserves my attention more than some ambitious actress with a “perfect” body. No one’s perfect, including the hot girl on the screen. If we are perfect, it’s in our flaws and how we portray them, overcome them and submit them to a higher power.

I had a rather lengthy debate surrounding this topic with some family and friends with a great many voices from all sides — some loving the skin, some hating it, some hating that I always have an opinion to lay against things such as this. They are my friends and family and I love them, but I have an opinion on just about everything and I’ll continue to express it. However, one of my dissenters makes a wonderful point that the real impact can be made by not going to movies that show skin and try to get others to do the same so we can hit the producers where it really hurts — in the pocketbook.

This person makes a great point. I have no argument for it.

I won’t stop seeing them, though, for a few reasons. First, I love stories, and if I must endure a 15-sec tame sex scene in order to enjoy a roughly hour-to-hour and a half-long movie, I will. I wish I could wish away all the parts of a movie I don’t like and just watch what I want to see. However, life isn’t always so easy.

However, I have cleansed my own library of movies with unneeded sex scenes, or scenes that I just don’t feel affected by, and have thrown them away. I will also take care when I purchase movies I’ve seen in the theater and not bring them home on DVD. If I hear a movie I might go see has a gratuitous sex scene, I might forgo it. However, I won’t necessarily go out of my way just to see if it may or may not have one. I can’t always screen life — my best course of action is to build up habits of honor in which any view of nudity instantly makes my eyes “bounce,” as it is sometimes called. When men who discipline themselves against lust see a rather buxom, scantily clad, or outright nude woman, they build habits to “bounce” immediately from something inappropriate to something more appropriate and then will not dwell upon what they’ve seen.

This extends beyond movies into the every day.

I don’t want to see a woman’s cleavage to her mid-belly. It’s just not attractive. A woman who so willingly displays everything is likely not to hold it in high value. Some women may not like to believe their body has power — except when they want it to. If someone points out what it does to men — even those seeking to be honorable — they lay the blame against the men and say they have the right to dress as they like and that they dress for themselves.

Sorry folks, I might be trying to clean up my language, but that is complete and utter bullshit. If this world were full of women, they might go nude, they might wear thin clothing, but it wouldn’t be sexual or attractive in nature. Men and women frame how to dress based upon rules that ultimately are levied against the opposite sex’s perception of that fashion. Even if a woman dresses up to go out with her girlfriends and has no desire to find a man, she will likely never dress up in sweats and a t-shirt. She will have something nice and colorful on, and even if women love the fashions for the fashion sake, the fashion designs are based on how it parallels or opposes the fashion of the other gender.

In this Americanized culture, women who display what culture discourages are making a display of power, whether they wish to acknowledge it or not. It is up to them to recognize that power and then choose how they wish to use it — with or without respect for both what it does to others and how it makes them appear. It may not be easy to swallow, and people may not like the idea that they can’t just do it for themselves, but it is what it is. I wish we could all just be independent and make life choices regardless of others, but even with all my individuality, I know that that doesn’t always work.